A Single's Approach to the Church

Found this article on Crosswalk.com about the benefit of single men and women adopting each other as "brothers" and "sisters" as we relate to one another inside the church. The author makes a good point: we believers, even singles, are modeling the Bride of Christ and because of this we need to keep moral purity at the top of our priority list. Our Bridegroom is Jesus and He wants His bride to be focus on remaining pure. Of course, He knows this is not possible for us to accomplish on our own, which is why He freely gives us his grace and has justified us before His Father. But our intention is to guard our ways and try to be pure for Him.

Here's the first portion of the article:

Singles in the Church: The Bride's Sibling Revival

By Tim Laitinen
Crosswalk.com Contributing Writer

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, in the sight of Almighty God, and in the presence of these witnesses here assembled, to unite these single believers together in the bonds of Christ-honoring relationships as joint members of the Bride of Christ.

OK, so maybe there are no vows for single Christians, but does that mean we don't have relationship responsibilities to each other? 

Might one of the reasons many churches consider us a ghost demographic be our reluctance to fellowship well within our faith communities?  Do we use our singlehood as a relationship crutch, or as a holding pattern until we get married?  How many of us impatiently ditch God's mandate for sexual purity?

Singlehood affords us unique opportunities to establish friendships with a variety of people.  And yes, one of those friendships may, in fact, lead to marriage.  But don't get ahead of yourself! What can single believers do to develop and maintain Christ-honoring relationships, and how can we help each other remain accountable to our Eternal Bridegroom, Christ himself?

Mature Beyond the Meat Market

God created diversity for a reason.  Being involved in a community of faith involves cultivating genuine interpersonal connections, which in turn widen our perspectives and help us exercise our spiritual gifts.  Singles who impulsively scan the Sunday school classroom for new spousal potential or hover within their own preferred cohort can miss participating in the broader body of believers, which is intended to be interdependent.  If you feel isolated in your church, it may have little to do with your marital status.

Unless you're from a culture where your parents choose your spouse, it's only natural for singles to evaluate members of the opposite sex regarding their compatibility as a possible mate.  Being biblically discriminating isn't itself a sin.  Just don't view every friendship with the opposite sex as a pre-marriage interview.

But how many churches foster just such an environment with their singles programming?  We all know which churches have the meat markets where we live.  They're the ones relying more on popular culture for inspiration than the Gospel.  They can be fun to attend, but be suspicious if your senses get more stimulated than your mind.


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